Sino ang Atenista???

Was about to leave Xavier University when a grimy old man approached him. The complete stranger asked him to buy him some ice water. To his surprise, that old man was bleeding, blood flowing from his forehead and there was a noticeable burse in his face. The student caught by surprised abandoned his intention to go home and decided to help this old man. His instinct led him to go to the Rizal Hospital knowing that the service there is free since the money he had was just enough for him to travel home. From the front gate they travelled all the way to the back but only faced a locked gate. His second option was the Loyola house, residence of the Jesuits. Unfortunately, the porter told him that nobody was home. So the distressed student has lost all thinkable options but thankfully enough, in that moment the porter spoke and suggested to call the KKP Director’s office instead.

After Sir Ermin and I finished a fruitful conversation inside his office, the phone rang. I wondered who the caller was since I noticed a slight change of tone of Sir Ermin’s voice. I got patches of information from his replies and made the assumption that it is something of an emergency. Once the call was over, he shared what it was all about. I felt shivers climb up my spine.

I immediately recalled our earlier conversation. We talked about ways to creatively foster a deeper appreciation of Atenean values and behold, as we where talking about it, this student was living it out in that very moment.

He then arrived at the KKP office. Since he has no extra cash, the office provided assistance. He accompanied the old man to the Hospital. His deed did not just stop there; he went all the way to accompany the old man back to his home in Carmen. This is magis.

Atenean heroes are true and living. The amazing story of this student highlighted the truth that a Good Samaritan still does exist. I hope his story serves as an inspiration for all of us ateneans. May his story emphasize that our identity as ateneans is not so much defined by our status, the way we speak, academic loyalty, or even wearing all ateneo shirts and accessories but it is defined by our DEEDS coming from a true concern for others especially the poor.

A message to Freshmen FFP leaders

I got an accidental chance to share a very brief testimonial to a large group of freshmen students for ACLD. When I saw them, I got reminded of my own freshmen year – a year of emotional ironies; from excitement to anxieties, passivity and seriousness. But in that gathering, there is one thing that holds them together. That somehow, they demonstrated a sense of leadership in their class which led them to take the position of FFP team leader.

Reviewing the road I took, I can really now say that this first opportunity to lead has tremendous value. You see, I never had that opportunity to “shepherd” eager classmates in my first year. I could recall our team leader always checking our attendance and requirements, plotting the dates of our group prayer and sharing, and delegating tasks for the numerous projects of FFP. These are the very basic of leadership and this can all well be nurtured in your given position.

In our sharing, I think it is an understatement to say that we have overemphasized the process of self-mastery. We are trained to marry the process and it is an absolute necessity in leadership. So I begin by encouraging all freshmen to explore their surroundings, get to know new people aside from your high school friends or block mates (ACLD network is one good venue), and get to engage with different opportunities offered by the school and your community (FFP immersion, outreach, NSTP). These are great venues to discover the miracle of you. I say this with the assumption that you posses a degree of confidence and people skill that made you a “leader” in the first place.

I also suggest that you keenly observe your surroundings and start spotting areas where you feel you can do something about and if you want to involve in a student organization, I believe there are already existing organizations that are geared towards amending these areas for improvements. In this process, you can link your personal interests and the area of change you want to work for in your college years.

That is my advice. I believe college can be lived to the fullest if you take an extra mile to consciously know yourself and with that knowledge and appreciation that goes with it, translate it to concrete acts of service for others. Aside from this basic notion, a deeper reason exists that I found very important once you start your leadership journey in Xavier. It is knowing that we are all educated or pulled out from society in a sense so we can learn and every time we return to society (the real world outside the walls of XU) it is a moral duty for us to translate that education into works of justice – making a difference in the lives of others. Four years in Xavier is too short for a freshman with a flaming heart to lead and serve. Start now.

Doable Heroism

(late post) This day, we speak about the idea of heroism and the traits that goes along with it. This word bears tremendous value for me since it is one of the pillars of Ignatian Leadership as described by Chris Lowney in his book “Heroic Leadership”. In his words, he spoke of heroism as “energizing yourself and others with heroic ambitions and a passion for excellence.” Having this in mind, I would like to have this opportunity to share my own appropriation of heroism as a student in Xavier University.

When I hear the word heroism, the instant idea that comes into mind is “sacrifice”. I believe that mere mortals become heroes because some point in their lives, they made great sacrifices for the common good. In a blink, names such as Rizal, Bonifacio, and Ninoy surfaces when I think about heroes and any man can rationalize that they became heroes because they gave their lives for a cause greater than their selves. Now, I came to understand that the magnanimity of heroism does not necessarily come from acts of giving one’s life (literally dying) but it speaks of all forms of actions contemplated for the greater good and animated beyond the bounds of comfort and safety. Speaking in the context of being a student, I think that a call to be heroic can be very well exercised in our learning, in our relationships and in our great journey of self discovery.

Heroism and Self Awareness

I am a loyalist, a 6 in the Enneagram. My type’s need is to have a sense of security from the perilous world. This is the reason why when I find an organization or a cause that I can trust and believe in, I stick with it undyingly and even reach to a point of blind obedience. In my reflection, I saw that I was trying to fulfil a heroic deed when I consciously and intently try to loose away from that sense of security and direct guidance from a group that has become synonymous with my identity. I know that I am breaking away from neither the cause nor the relationships but I am breaking away from that sense of security, familiarity, and comfortableness that would have solidified my compulsions more if I would not confront it. I intently moved into an uncharted territory plagued by uncertainty and instability – the very thing that we sixes fear. In a personal level, that is a simple attempt to be heroic which is facing my underlying fear and breaking my own security for a greater good. That greater good is redemption which hopes to capacitate me to be freer.

Heroism and relationships

I never had a girlfriend before so I speak in the context of NGFSB paradigm which pretty much gravitates around the idea of non-romantic relationships and the “kuya pa help” relationships. I believe working in the context is all about offering your help for others in the form of tutoring, help in their projects, help them in a certain degree facilitate their own struggles and countless others. I speak as if I am public property but in a sense it is close to that. With my relative freedom, I can offer myself readily to others. I believe my challenge is to always be ready to give and to give more and this is simple heroism.

Heroism and Learning

One subject I can instantly recall is a minor subject. TAX 1 is a dreaded subject for me because I simply find it hard to comprehend it. It takes ample amount of brain energy to remember all the necessary elements needed to identify certain taxable categories. Now I believe this is where heroism can be exercised. It is exercised when I achieve to completely eradicate that minor-major mentality which is common among us. I should treat all subjects in equal weight and this should be reflected in the amount of time allotted for its study and mastery. By going against that psychological inertia, I can begin to build a momentum that hopefully will lead me to get better grades – a personal heroic deed of challenging deeply seated mentalities.

So again, I hope that I somehow simplified the magnanimity of heroism into doable acts that can very well exercise in a personal sphere. But in the end, the highest call of heroism is really giving ourselves, sacrificing and sharing our selves to something greater than our own – an in our Catholic context, for the God and his people (The Kingdom of God).

Thank You Tita Cory

This morning as I was watching the live telecast of the funeral of President Corazon, I already prepared a reflection for this occasion, but after seeing the people and tears and hearing the messages, the eulogies of the closest people to President Cory, I realized that my written article never came close to fathom the great and gracious heart this woman had. Listening to Fr. Arevalo in his voice clearly drawing back tears while he recounts and fond memories with Pres. Cory, also listening to Cris crying over the loss of her very loving mother, or listening to Mel, Pres. Cory’s security detail share the generosity and the humility this woman possessed, always giving importance even to the lowly of people, with the hinidi kita malilimutan song, I can’t help it but be moved into tears. I think most of us here, those who watched, those who felt the grief, shed tears of sorrow because we felt that feeling loss and that senses of absolute separation form a loved one- having in mind that we can never have another one like her. As if our own mothers or our own grandmothers has gone ahead. And i think that is one effect Cory has in all of us, that image of a mother, a mother to our nation. Painful as it is, but true, it is only during her death, her very recent death that I began to intentionally retrace my past lessons in Philippine history, reconnect that past to what is now and try to see the life of this gracious women in yellow through the eyes of a generation who never knew what it is like to regain freedom. And as part of this generation, the death of President Cory made me see not just what we have lost but what we have also gained. And this is Hope. This hope manifested by 3 realities of the President, even in her time of death is her legacy for me.

First, the adoration brought about by multitudes of people, rich and poor, powerful and powerless, came together in her wake and the outpouring of pasasalamat and love made me see that indeed it is possible to have a modern Filipino president that is loved, that is respected, that is honoured, that can inspire, that can move people contrary to what we have been accustomed to in our recent memory. She understood clearly that the highest pinnacle of democracy is the peaceful transition of power which she readily surrendered to her elected successor. She was allergic to power and remained a symbol of humility and a strong radiant moral force of democracy till the end of her days. It had been done before that we can have this kind of president and it can happen in the future. And we thank President Cory for making us believe that it is possible.

Second, The strong and unwavering faith defined her character and her leadership throughout her life. This is one great legacy she will leave to the Filipino people. She made it true that having the most powerful position does not mean that you have compromise your personal faith and values for the sake of expediency. From what I have seen in her last SONA in youtube, and to countless articles in the internet, she admitted that she made mistakes, but those where honest mistakes and she readily told the people about it. She was afraid to lie because of her faith, she was did not to surrender during the coup attempts because she knows that her commitment to God is to preserve democracy for the Filipino people. She stood as a great God fearing leader and because of her, we can believe again that a true measure of heroic leadership is the depth of faith one has for God manifested by her deeds.

Third, People Power, this extraordinary manifestation of democracy is the gift of the Filipino to the world and this was made possible by the leadership of President Cory. This event culminated a long boiling dissent against a dictatorship that has suppressed freedom for so many years but this culmination did not explode into an arms struggle, instead this culmination turned out to be a miracle, the first of its kind, that radical change is possible without blood and bullets. This made me reconnect to my present state. In my volunteer work in KKP, I have realized that I enjoy the freedom to critically think, the freedom to organize, the freedom to protest because of the courage and the sacrifice of this past generation. I believe more that idea of social change without violent struggle because it worked before and this was made true to countless other people power revolts around the world inspired by our very own. Now, our generation are the inheritors of that legacy of people power. Let us live the spirit of it by reclaiming our nation’s destiny once more in this upcoming elections and maybe through this, we can carry on the legacy of people to the next generation. And we thank President Cory for embracing a call she knew she never wanted but accepted it fully because of her love for freedom and the Filipino people.
Let her legacy remain in our hearts, that burning idea of integrity, faith, and sacrifice and may it bear good fruits for the future generations. Mabuhay ka Tita Cory!

and all will just fall into its proper place

Exiting the Church, my mind my set for a delicious baby back ribs dinner at Bigby’s. Out of nowhere, my mother told me that they have to get something from the house. Moments later, I noticed something peculiar about my mother. She keeps on texting (which is not so usual since she rarely brings out her phone in the streets). Then my brother seems in a bit of a hurry. All of these things I dismiss as nothing more than part of the birthday rush. Arriving at home, I noticed a bit of a mess in our kitchen. My father then led me to the corridor leading to our living room after I freshened up. In that moment, there is already that growing feeling of “they are up to something”. In an instant, as I turned in sight of the living room, a jolt came rushing at the top of my spine. This is an elaborate conspiracy! Employing my parents and my relatives! There they are, my closest friends sitting in my living room! And turning at my right, I saw the dining table adorned with scrumptious looking food. And the crowning piece of lechon at the center. Within a few seconds, I tried to gather my senses, came to them one by one and awkwardly shook their hands. I felt stupid doing that but that was the only thing I can think of doing in that very unexpected situation! I began to walk back and forth trying to grasp this brewing conspiracy and the sense of excitement grew with it. People began to come to the house. And finally around 7pm, I was told to hide somewhere, a sort of “re-surprise” procedure since I came in too early as I was told. I hid in the CR for quite awhile. I was then asked to close my eyes, my heart started to beat faster and when I was asked to open it with a resounding yell . . . To my complete and utter surprise, to the most unexpected and surprising air – Fr. Jett with Ma’am Lily stood inside my house! And that historic night began.

Surprises are really hard to orchestrate, you have to think of so many scenarios, you have to gain the allegiance of so many conspirators, and you have to keep them from sending any signal that might spill the beans. So many things to consider, so many risks to manage and these things is what I am so deeply grateful about - the great effort (inviting people, coordinating people, convincing the university president to come) that these people employed just to make this peculiar day special. This effort by the people who headed it and supported it, one common denominator fuelled this effort, I believe and this is LOVE. Throughout the night, this idea oscillated around my head. I kept on asking my myself “What did I ever do to you to deserve such effort, attention, and love”. Sounds corny and overrated but It really bothered me. The whole event made me rethink, revaluate and reflect on myself, on others, on how I deal with people, how I “value” people and especially on the idea of grace. This entire chunks of questions surfaced and It took me quite I while to put all of these things together. The 3 things that I can extract from this day is gratitude, friendship and a renewed sense of hope.

For ALL the PEOPLE and the things that have shaped me, in bitterness or in sweetness I thank Thee for it. These 20 years of life is a priceless gift and I can’t expound more that deep sense of gratitude in my heart. I think it is best to pose a question for this. “If God is SO generous to me, why can’t I be generous to Him?” This event made me trace the threads of my life once more and view its elaborate interconnections and fusions from the top – seeing an unfinished, a forming tapestry.

I am the aggregate, the collection of all the people I’ve connected for the past 20 years. I am who I am today because of these people – friends and family that have revealed to me that unyielding love that makes my life worth living.

Lastly, it is a renewed sense of hope – an invigorated sense of mission in life. This celebration also acts as a confirmation of where God is leading me. The outpouring of love and community affirmed the direction I am taking, the people I am with, the values I strive to live by, the dreams I try to achieve, and the voices I try to hear. And it seems like everything is prepared for and is being unfolded every single day. And I guess this is what ma’am Lily said about the magical mysteries of life. Things just come in, and you don’t need to make clear sense of it, you just accept it as it is – a grace, an unmerited favour from above that leads you to a destiny you never imagined before – and all will just fall into its proper place.

THANK ALLLLL THE PEOPLE WHO GRACED THE EVENT! ALLLLL OF YOU! THANK YOU!!!! AMDG

Feeling Lost, Gone and Aimless?

It was like a blessing from online when this person asked me some advice in how to re-direct his life. I gave him some generic advice and he added to me that it would be better if I blog about it because he has been following my past blogs. This gave me a jolt of energy; someone has actually been following my posts and has got some insights from it. Now flowing from this, I would like to share a few thoughts about life directions. I believe this topic is quite important for us college students because we are now approaching the door steps of the real world. And in my personal story, I also have a little trouble about life directions in terms of “specific” life careers but for the sake of focus, I will touch on “direction” with in college life.

It is quite typical for all of us college students to reach a certain plateau or hiatus in our drive. This is very normal. That feeling of boringness, the feeling of lingering meaninglessness of the things we routinely do, that feeling of detachment, that feeling of “a head floating”; that zombie like-state that you just wish the day or the entire school year will instantly come to an end. Again, this is very normal. The cases that we should try to be cautious about and aware off is the coping mechanisms we do that might lead us to a nose dive such as habit of ditching classes, habitual drinking, drugs, and so forth. And when we reach a certain saturation point, it is very difficult to climb out from the pit. In all of these realities, there is only one truth I can think of: The greatest human being who can save us in this pit of hell is no other than our very selves. You have to make it a point to brush off the dust in our shoulders and declare to the whole world that I am back in the game! I am not a loser! And by God’s grace, I can give justice to my own creation by being the best of who I am! Enough with the excuses, enough with the habits, enough with the slack, it is time to liberate my true self from the clutches of sloth and greed. Summoning your personal energies to declare these words and by the fullness of your faith then you can slowly accumulate and regain power. Then this is where the momentum starts, it is where the energy starts to build up and by your own resounding personal declaration, you have unlocked the full power of your possibilities and slowly defeating the enemy within.

The key element of sustaining this momentum is having a support group (good friends) or a mentor who you trust and look up to. Find one and I believe there are plenty in this world ( i recommend Jesuit priests and brothers). Share your thoughts to that person, your struggles and ambitions; he/she can aid you in processing these experiences and making sense of them in the context of your own life. Their energies and “positivism” is contagious! 2nd is the practice I keep on repeating in all my posts, the consciousness examen. This is the bedrock of my life. Always allocate time to review the day, the response and feelings you had. By doing so, you have a constant self-evaluation tool that will check if you really lived up to your declaration and are you really winning the war against your “old self” in a daily basis? By having this constantly, it will not be difficult to chart progress. Third is Know what you want and what is important to you– the hardest part. This is the basis of your decisions in college so early on we should try to invest time in knowing what we want and what we need. And i guess God provides that answer in our daily experiences of consolations and desolations. Through the examination of consciousness, we can pin point exactly the moments of joy and sadness, excitement and boringness, intense interest and complete indifference not just of a single day but of a single year or even a span of years if we keep on listening. Linking it all together produces the tapestry of God’s will in your life. Again and again, listen to your heart for that is where God is. And all things will just fall into place.

In the end, these are just anecdotes from my own experience. Again, I am not speaking as an expert. The fundamental truth to this besides the one I stated at the start is that God has a unique plan for each and everyone us – vocation. That can be found in the intersection of your deepest desires and the world’s greatest needs. And this saying I truly believe, without this, what I have written is meaningless. How do we know our desires? By turning away from self-destructive habits, declaring war against our old self, build support circles and constantly examen ourselves in prayer (where desires, values comes out).

AMDG

from VIRUS to SELF-ESTEEM

I am not writing this as a psychology expert, I am writing this as a college student who, for almost 20 years, has been appropriating my own understanding of this very crucial subject of our growing generation – self esteem. Once you look it up in the web, instantly it shows to you that self esteem deals about your worth, your value, and your happiness as a human being. Now, this subject has become a primal concern to all of us young people who are discovering his or her place in the greater scheme of things. This has become the growing subject we college student should try to reflect upon and act upon BUT really this concern has not been given so much attention in our conversations and discussions and this my friends is the pervasive case of LOW self-esteem. This has inflicted so many souls, paralyzing them from the inside out and this is that faceless ill invading our young generation. In my own story, there are so many times, so many instances that this concern has surfaced. Faced with doubts, frustrations, anxieties and hopelessness, I have grappled with it for quite some time and after all of those struggles, I have realized that there is a singular most important ingredient that tames this monster. It is a hardened process of self-awareness that can only be achieved when one gains the ability to listen to oneself. And in my understanding, that is why countless of our brothers and sisters are suffering from this ill because our ability to listen has been eroding slowly. Our ability to connect our past to our present is deteriorating, our ability to transcend is being clouded by so many forms of ideologies competing for our loyalty. Our technology has given its toll. We silence our internal rumble with earphones; we substitute presence with being online; we consider text messaging as the foundation of relationships. So it is not surprising that we are suffering a loss sense of worth and value because we as a generation has pegged our worth on externalities – our grades, our clothes, our technologies, our money.

So here lies the challenge. Let us reconnect with our hearts and ourselves intimately by allowing time for us to tune in to the movements of our hearts. Nurture that habit of examining ourselves in a daily basis, writing it down in our journals and offering it all to God – nurture your faith. Also, it is a good idea to share your feelings with very close friends because this gives us a sense of community that does not only enjoy over movies, beer and malling, but with raw expression of the human soul. By doing so, a sense of love develops, a sense of appreciation develops and that case of self-esteem fades into noting.

Things We can Do these historical TEN DAYS.

Now, the jubilation has faded and the reality has revealed itself. Some may agree, some may don’t but for me, ten days of disconnection from school’s routine gives us a sense of random and spontaneous space and time to do it. We can think of so many things to do aside from homework (if miraculously your teacher gave you one because s/he knew that classes will be suspended beforehand.) and at a certain point, we may get lost. This is my effort to at least give some few tips about making this opportunity of momentary pause to its fullest.

1. This is the perfect time for you to register to Vote! XU is the only school in the city suspended, so maybe you don’t have much competition in COMELEC.
2. Have a new haircut. I know I do.
3. Go home and Visit your high school friends. It is good to reconnect with the old and sturdy roots.
4. If you have clear books or note books, you can start labelling them. At least this helps you keep your files organized.
5. Play a sport, this can keep us fit and healthy – a great counter to the temptation of becoming a couch potato in these 10 days.
6. Read a book/study – this only works with most people, not all. I’ll be reading Alinsky’s Rules for Radicals.
7. DOTA! CALL OF DUTY 4! I’m just learning DOTA, Call of Duty – memorized the game!
8. DVD Marathon – it is good to revisit old habits during the summer days,
9. Evaluate Your Priorities and Yourself. This is the best time to evaluate your habits and perceptive regarding school and other essential life factors because you are given the rare chance to be detached and de-burdened. Make good use of it.
10. For the student organizers, it is a good time to re-evaluate the direction of your

organization and set proper adjustments.

But as we dive into the randomness of this 10 days, let us always put into mind the primary reason why we have this in the first place - because of the virus. So exert an extra-effort about our health and if you feel the symptoms, immediately contact the proper authorities.